Goodbye to you

  Still cant forget you yet, not even by abit wtf man, you both are gg to be one month?? And I am like an idoit here fucking counting the days, fucking missing you, and fucking worrying for you. Fuck this shit man. I am doing the best I can to make you understand what I was trying to say, but you seem too in love with him, my words did not manage to wake you up. Sometimes things just dont go your way, kind of fucked but what choice do you have. I am not God I cant do what I want with it gg my own way. Yeah so well I have to wait for the chance to happen before I can prove to you that I still love you more than anything.

      Now you said I am irritating after I cared so much for you. Like wtf, sometimes I dont know what you are talking, like you change your mind fucking fast. You just keep crashing me down everyday. And you are the only one now that can pull me up so please pull me up fast....



    Now sick but still dont wanna stay at home as I will keep thinking, so left the house early for the passed few days then go prime meet Zafran and Ah di we choing monster hunter the whole day till night we go home slp then the next day again like that. Haha sounds retarded but I just wanna keep my mind off you thats all...

Now gone from your heart

Now I have lost you... I am lost really lost. Why must this happen. I have no mood do anything now. I have lost hope in everything le. Really hope you can be there for me now.

Wish you all the best for your everything and I will still be there for you and I love you my baby.

Loving You Sooo Silently.

I wonder why I kept dreaming of you , for this passed four days I have been dreaming about the same dream. May sound freaky but for me was damn sad, I kept asking you questions and you keep answer the answer that I did not want to hear, every day waking up in clod sweat.

These few days for the time we stop talking my friends are doing their best to entertain me doing shit stuff just to keep my mind of you. I was touched by what they did. I dare to say that during that time I was still thinking about you as everywhere I walk, everything I do also remind me of you. I know you hate me now I don't see the care in your eyes for me anymore seems like you really love him alot well what can I say.

I miss you, I have no idea if you still do but well no choice seeing you from a distance is all I can do.


For your happiness you bastard me that really hurts me alot. Don't you even feel a least bit guilty? The way you treat me now? That's alright I understand maybe you just wanna hurt me back the way I hurt you last time. Hey no need to do all these as leaving me itself did enough damage to me.

I am not jealous, come on I belive I won't lose him in anything. But the only thing now is that you love him more so you can't be touch by the things I have done.

Babe you may be happy now but what about next time. I really hope you know I have changed and waiting now for you to give me one more chance.

The pictures that you left behind same like memories. Some have made us cry some has made us laugh . But one mistake made you leave. When you are saying your prayers, try to understand that I will make mistakes as I am no superman, I am just an ordinary guy.

When he holds you close, when he pulls you near, when he says the words you want to hear. The only thing I want is to be him but saying these words of mine to make you love me. That's all I want. You to be back with me.

Well I really hope one day you will call me if you need anything or just someone to talk to. But the best of all I wish you would call me saying you can't forget me... How I wish you could be mine back again....

And I am still sorry my dear, for what I have done to you. But please also remember that I still love you alot.

Missing You Right Now.

  I will try my best to post everyday le, because this is the only way I am able to tell her how I feel. Today was still a fucked up day. But manage to pour my heart out to someone. So it felt kind of better, I still miss her, seeing her blog really makes me upset. But nevermind, the only thing now is I got to prove myself, I will change yes it may be just words but my action are soon gonna show.Yes I admit I still miss her, still dream of her and still love her. I wont give up on someone that is so good so easily. I see you in class with my best friend so close till an extend of holding hands yes it may be play de. But.. Nevermind. I dont regret knowing you, loving you and being together with you but my only regret is to hurt you. I am sorry. Just to let you know if one day we manage to get back together, wow I swear you will see a different and better me. I am going all out for you, I will wait belive me I will. And I am telling you I belive I can do better then him now. Because you mean more then a lover and you are so so so important. If you said I left scars I am sorry please forgive me. I promise that I will be the plastic surgeon to remove all those scars. Never will I give you up. Today I dreamt of you and him again the worst part is in class, never will I dream in class and today was the first. Thats why I cried. I am pouring my heart out for you and I will do anything for you belive me I will.


     Baby... Thats what you used to call me. Now you are calling someone else he took my place. How fuck can that be. People say they understand how I feel, Fuck them, no one fucking knows how I feel, try feeling this, your ex just told you that she was tgt with another guy while you still have alot alot of feelings for her, after talking she walked of and with your own fucking eyes she went into the arms of the other guy. Put yourself in my shoes now you feel it?



        I will fucking do anything just to have you in my arms. And give you security. My friend told me to study so that she will next time notice you as she feel more secure for her future. I told him this I may fail my N's but no matter what I wont pull her down with me. No matter i beg, steal or what I will make sure I will make her life comfortable. Give her a roof over her head. yes we may not have money but I swear I will give her happniess that even rich people wont be able to feel it. And I will make sure I do it.


Fuck it man fucking stress now. Tell me how am I supposed to live without you sia. You are my everything. And you will always be my baby, my dear and my baobei. I am sorry.

That Should Be Me...

 At first letting go of you was impossible. But after today a good friend of mine told me alot of things. And well was kind of true. If he can give her happiness and treat her well, at first I thought I could win her back as I was kind of confident that I can treat her better now. But well her heart is not with me already so well at least I should feel happy for her, I cannot promise you people I wont be sad but being happy for you both is true not sacarstic. Well dont be too happy that I lost her cause I will not give up so soon I want to prove to you that I have changed. So I will wait. And to the lucky dude fucker cb dog lol make sure you treat her well. I am kind of sad and jealous that you got her but also wish you both last long.


 To Jessica: I know what I have done is wrong, hurting you, lying to you and neglecting you. But all I wanna say is I am sorry, hope you forgive me yea? But just could not accept the fact that you are leaving me, you mean alot to me and a V.I.P in my life. I regreted not treausring you, if I could just turn back the time I swear I will treat you alot better, like a fucking princess well too late for this not just hope for the future I will be waiting. I will be there for you not matter what. And lastly thank you for loving me....


                         I WAS REPLACEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!




 That should be me holding your hand, That should be me making you laugh, That should be me feeling your kiss, That should be me buying you gifts.




 All the memories will be kept safe in my heart and will nvr be forgotten. Ily still. :)

Missing You Like Crazy!

Well we kinda have a on-off relationship and finally knew the truth after all the wasted tears and quarrels, she decided that she could not take it and chose to leave me for good. Its was kind of drama like there's like a fucking love triangle and she did not know who to chose. Well now I know what my friend of mine was trying to say all along. Before you lose something learn to treasure it, before it is too late. Well everything happens for a reason so cut the shit out just fucking learn to treausre someone and don't do any shit that hurt the other party! Well we still can be friends yeah! I will still be there for you. I believe that he wont treat you bad so hope you two last long!

What A Day!

  Had a talk with my girlfriend after everything we decided to end this relationship. Even though we continue soon we will be back to the same situation so might as well end it here. Kind of sad but well its for the best.:) She is still my fucking good friend!!! Memories will be kept in my heart and my phone haha.